I "scammed" my scammer - or something like that...
How a Facebook Marketplace transaction ruined my Christmas Eve - and how my intuition saved me from a $2200 loss. I may had changed some elements to preserve myself (but they don't change the story).
My phone buzzed—$2,200 from a stranger on Venmo. That’s when I knew my Christmas Eve was ruined. I wish it was a generous Christmas gift lol, but I wasn't that lucky. Anyway, I hope you are ready for some story time…
Here's one of my mantras while living in the US: why pay full price for something when you can literally get it for - sometimes waaaaay - less by shopping secondhand? People in this country shop a lot - and that's a topic for another day - and I think that's the reason why the secondhand market is so strong as well. From clothing to electronics, there are so many ways and platforms to find things that people are getting rid of (sometimes brand new or barely used). And I'm not estranged to that either: since we don't have a lot of space in NYC, I've also sold a couple of things, so let's say I'm an experienced buyer and seller. No experience prevented me from almost getting scammed on Christmas Eve, though. And I didn't see that coming…
Everything started when my sister - who is a photographer based in Paris - bought a camera online in the US and sent it to my place. Since the camera was in high demand, it took months until the store delivered the product at the beginning of December. And because she wanted this camera for a trip she took in August, she bought one from another person. But since the camera was in high demand, we decided not to cancel the original order - she figured she could sell the new one once it arrived for a couple of extra dollars. Then, when the camera arrived, I offered her to list it on Craigslist and on Facebook Marketplace. And no, I didn't mind the "hassle".
I listed the brand-new camera on Thursday, the 19th, for $2200, and although I thought it would be a hit, I only got two messages - one from one guy ("$1800 and I will take off from your hands tomorrow!" lol I gotta love a shopper's confidence) and another one from another guy that immediately asked if he could pick it up after confirming it was available. Honestly, that should be my first red flag. I mean, he didn't even ask where I was located. After two days and some vague answers, I must say, we finally set a date and time, but he wasn't very responsive. We agreed to meet on Monday, December 23rd, at 12:30pm, and when I asked him how he would pay, he said he would use Venmo. I often use the app to pay for things I buy on Facebook Marketplace and also to receive money from things I sell. I even used it once to sell a camera lens for $400, so I never thought it could be an issue to use Venmo for high-valued items. Once everything was set, I shared my number with the guy and asked him to text me when he was on his way. I usually do that cause sometimes I miss notifications from Facebook Messenger.
I was busy that Monday morning, so I didn't see that he immediately asked me to push it to 3:30 pm. Because of my lack of response, he called me to ask to reschedule it. The call id showed a number from Ohio. Yeah, that could be another sign something was off, but I mean, people move from one state to another, right? Since I had to run some errands, we pushed it to 6pm. After hanging up, he immediately called me back to confirm the camera was new - which, looking back, was odd. I mean, that's something you confirm before setting up a pickup, right? Anyway, it was scheduled for Monday, December 23rd, 6pm. Later that day, when I was afraid I wouldn't make it on time, I messaged him and asked him if it would be cool to move to 6:30pm.
"No prob. I'm also late, I will let you know".
It was almost 8pm, and I had gotten no updates from the guy. It was already dark outside and although I would meet him with my husband - I mean, it was an expensive item! - I messaged him to reschedule for the next day, at 12 pm. His lack of communication was making me uncomfortable. He answered me immediately: "Deal." He also added that he was "serious about it" and that he was late because of work. It sounded reasonable, although looking back, I see that it was a lot of back and forth.
It was already 12:30 pm on the next day, December 24th - Christmas Eve - when I realized the guy had ghosted me. I didn't message him - I just let it go. He wouldn't be the first person from Facebook Marketplace to do that. Part of me doesn't understand why people waste so much time reaching out to others, asking, "Is this available" hundreds of times and then disappearing, but I guess some people have way too much time. I just followed with my day - my husband and I would spend the evening by ourselves, and I was planning to cook a special meal for us, including a sweet focaccia.
Around 4pm, my phone started to ring - yeah, it was him, and I decided to ignore the call. I wasn't feeling that comfortable about talking to him over the phone, plus I was pissed because of the ghosting. He immediately texted me asking if he could come pick up the camera.
"Are you serious? You literally ghosted me today". He gave me some excuses about work, and I told him I would be home until 6pm, and if he could make it, that would be fine. It was my way of setting boundaries and not bothering our Christmas Eve with a Facebook Marketplace transaction. He confirmed the price and everything and said he was on his way. And a little bit before 6pm, it happened: $2200 hit my Venmo account. With no heads up. With no message confirming. And let's remember some important fact: I had never shared my Venmo with this guy. I know, I know, he figured it through my phone number, perhaps, but WTF!
My body immediately felt an adrenaline rush, my underarms started to get wet, and in my mind, the only thought was: red flag, OMG, red flag, OMG. That couldn't be right. Who in the world sends a stranger $2200 - before picking up the product? Was he out of his mind? I'm not that innocent to believe people are soooo honest and good. I was walking from one room to another, asking my husband, "What should I do? Should I start a transfer to my bank account to be on the safer side? Can this guy reverse the payment once I initiated a transfer to my bank?".
"Can a Venmo bank transaction be reversed?" search. "There is no way to cancel a Venmo payment once it's been sent." "Transfers cannot be canceled or expedited." I was trying to retrieve my peace of mind while reading those Google search results. The clock was ticking, the guy was on his way (or as he said), and I had to decide what to do. Then, in the middle of all that stressful situation, I decided to initiate a transfer to my bank account. Cool, right? I would hand the camera to the guy once he arrived, and everything would be ok, right? I had no intention of keeping the money without handling the product - I'm not a scammer, lol - but I had to protect myself from a possible scam - which, at that moment, I had no idea what kind of scam that could be. Part of me wanted to convince myself I was overreacting, and that was a protection, just in case.
Well, thank God there's something called intuition. Even after starting the transaction, I was convinced something was off. I wasn't confident about my move. No, in fact, I wasn't confident about the guy's move. I rushed to my computer. Please note: I'm a millennial, and I always have the urge to use my desktop when it comes to important tasks - like searching for scams. I decided to open my modern oracle. Google? No. It's called Reddit.
Reddit has a subreddit - or forum, or community - for every single topic in the world, and I absolutely love to use it for reviews, travel tips, and other experiences. People - in my experience - are honest and, in most cases, willing to help. I guess the fact that 99% of users have an avatar and a nickname means that egos are put aside when you are commenting on a topic on Reddit. I feel the intentions are truer compared to other social media platforms. So, when I typed the name of the guy - let's call him John Snow - the first result was from a Venmo subreddit, and the title had the word "scam."
OMG. OMG. OMG. I screamed. Click. Read.
The user was sharing something that had happened to him to raise awareness. He had sold some camera to a guy called "John Snow" and had received the money upfront, through Venmo, which he thought it was odd, but he delivered the camera anyway and forgot about it. Some days later, the guy started a chargeback through his bank.
OMG. OMG. OMG. "It's a scam!" - I screamed to my husband. "It's a f*ucking scam!".
It was past 6pm. The guy had messaged me again, saying he would be 10-15 min late. WTF! Always late, always pushing it. F*ck it! I decided to call it off.
"I'm leaving for a Christmas party. I'm on the road". I told him at 6pm, so I didn't feel bad about it. He insisted on picking up, "I'm almost there; I already sent you the money." I told him I hadn't checked my Venmo. "I'm on the road; I let you know; perhaps tomorrow works." I was buying myself time to figure it out what to do. I also tried to contact Venmo customer service cause I wanted to reverse the transfer and send him the money back. Unfortunately, didn't have enough time to explain the whole situation - I was automatically disconnected cause their customer service would shut down earlier that evening. Little did I know that transferring the money to my bank account actually saved me from another scam.
Over the next hours, my husband and I tried to process what had just happened. I was so nervous and feeling guilty about that situation, preparing dinner in the hope of saving our Christmas Eve - but it was too late. I know it may sound stupid, but the truth is that both of us were extremely stressed, and it took us more than some hours to decompress from what had happened. Meanwhile, my husband was trying to explain to me why I shouldn't send him the money back - while I was helplessly trying to understand. I mean, if someone sends some money you don't want, you just send it back, right? What's wrong with that? If you think like that, I'm sorry to inform you, but we are wrong.
It took me some hours to understand. Basically, Venmo doesn't have a "refund" button. So, if I sent him $2200, I would be initiating a new transaction, which wouldn't prevent the guy from disputing his original payment to me. By diving into Reddit topics, I found more people talking about this scam and explaining that sometimes the scammer's main goal is never picking up the product. They reschedule various times, and eventually, they send you the money, then you call the meeting off, and they ask for the money back. I'm not sure which plan my scammer had, but I wasn't willing to discover. I would not sell the camera to him anymore, and I wouldn't send him the money back through a new transaction. I needed to talk to Venmo so Venmo could reverse that transaction, not me. I had to wait until Thursday, the 26th since Venmo's customer service was off on Christmas Day.
But before that - and after a bad night of sleep, and, let's face it, after all that stressful situation) it finally hit me: I had saved the day. I had adventurously escaped from falling into a huge scam - I mean, we are talking about $2200, not $20. Sorry, but I will give myself credit for that: I had been some badass, and I was finally allowing myself to feel good about that.
And I must say that after I had settled down from my freaked-out moment, I was enjoying my privileged position - meaning, I knew what this guy was doing, but I was pretending to play his game - in some way. Before you ask me: "But what if the guy was serious?" COME ON. Once I started to analyze everything in reverse, it was easy to observe how the whole situation was odd.
His Facebook account was new, and his profile showed no activity; he was on and off on the chat; his number was from another state, and he referred to a neighborhood with an NYC at the end ("Yeah, I will be in Chelsea NYC") - no one that lives in NYC refers to the neighborhoods with an NYC at the end!; his Venmo account had no profile pictures - and no friends and no transactions; he changed his story a couple of times… like on Christmas morning when he texted me at 7am and came up with this story that the camera was a gift to his wife, and he needed "to pick up really quickly" that morning - he even wished me Merry Christmas, lol! At some other point, he said that he lived really close to me (not that I gave him my real address, it was a meeting point), but another time, he said he could stop by cause he would be driving "in your direction."
I mean, come on, dude. First, you would be in my neighborhood all day, then you live nearby, and then you would be driving in that direction anyway. And suddenly, is the camera a gift for your wife that you intended to purchase on Christmas Eve? There was a lot of silence and then candied messages to pick up a camera for his poor wife. For someone who had sent a stranger $2200, the guy was pretty chilled, honestly.
Since Venmo customer service was off on Christmas Day, I told him my account had been blocked for suspicious activity, and I needed to talk to Venmo the next day. "Feel free to start a chargeback", I told him. At this point, I was having fun.
Finally, on Thursday, the 26th, I talked to Venmo and explained the whole situation. And here it comes one of the most shocking part for me: even if Venmo reversed the transaction, the guy could still dispute his original transaction through his bank - and I would be at risk of loosing $2200. "I'm basically trapped", I thought. Venmo guidelines were simple: sit and wait.
"In your case, I would recommend waiting until the other person initiates the chargeback process; you can then return the funds they sent you. Many scammers wait until you transfer the funds to them to start the chargeback process with their bank account and you would have an outstanding balance with Venmo because of that outstanding balance. Unfortunately, there are people who will do that to get double the money back."
Ok then. I decided to sit and wait. And if on Christmas Day the guy was acting a little desperate, trying to play the victim, on the 26th, he was more intimidating in his conversation, texting me things like: "Is the deal on or off", "I need my money, it has been two days", "I have no option but coming to the address you gave me and talk to you face to face." I was trying to keep myself still. I told him I had talked to Venmo, and their orientation was for him to start a chargeback. Of course, he played dumb at first, wanting me to send a request so I could complete it. I was very clear with my communication, letting him know I would not initiate a new transaction and asking for a chargeback, which would be the safest option for both of us. He refused to accept that, but I reminded him that I had never asked for money upfront or even shared my Venmo with him.
It was a back-and-forth texting, and although I was cool and confident with my decision to not give up, I was kinda shaking and nervous. Then, I told him we could meet at a police station to solve the situation - and sent him the screenshot from Reddit with his "name." The guy didn't seem intimidated - but I had enough: I blocked him, gathered all the proof I had, and went to the police station myself to ask for orientation on what to do. It was good to be reassured that I was doing the right thing - the police didn't seem surprised with the scam. "I can't even tell you what I wish for people like this", the cop told me.
I'm still waiting for the chargeback notification while the money is sitting in my Venmo account (yeah, once it had hit my bank account, I put it back in my wallet on Venmo cause it's not my money). Keeping these $2200 could be a perfect and ironic end to this story - but I'm 100% sure this comes from a stolen credit card, so, at the end of the day, there's a victim somewhere missing it. I feel sorry for them - not for the guy who is too busy scamming more people, according to the new victim reports on the Reddit thread.
And that's it, my friends. That was my Christmas Eve. And that's how I saved the day.
And here are some lessons:
Always trust your gut if something doesn't feel right.
Cash is king for large online transactions.
Reddit is an underrated tool for scam detection.